Lauren and James

Last weekend, I went to the Adirondacks to climb a mountain with Peggy, 'Laine, Laurie and of course Cos. It was great - I hadn't climbed a mountain since Jeff died and I had forgotten that awesome feeling you get when thoroughly exhausted and drenched from your sweat, you reach the top and can see clearly heaven on earth.

As I was driving back to Rochester on Sunday, my mind drifted some and I thought about again, school starting, how much I missed Jeff and how I hadn't spoken to Lauren, Jeff's best buddy, for quite some time. I don't know as I have ever written much about Lauren, but I believe that Lauren and Jeff were soul mates. They had known each other since Kindergarten. And they have always been incredibly close...so close that when they last spoke to one another -- the afternoon that Jeff died -- they ended the conversation with "I love you." ... And they weren't "going out" as the kids say.

About 30 minutes after I got home that night, the phone rang. It was Lauren and she asked if she might come over to visit -- she was in the neighborhood. I had a wonderful visit with her -- nothing to do with the conversation really -- everything to do with the fact that she visited me and that she speaks so much from the heart. We talked about Jeff's death and the sensations she got the day he died. We talked about how twins often get the same kinds of sensations when something happens to one of them and how close she and Jeff were. It was again, heaven on earth, for her to have called me AND to have come over and visited. (She just got her license several weeks ago.)

The night after that, I got a call from James, Jeff's close friend. James and Jeff had been throwing the ball to each other both being Freshman and on the varsity team -- the afternoon Jeff died. James chatted with me - gave me an update of what was happening with the start of school. During our conversation, James told me that he was working on a Christmas present for me (this really made me smile). He asked if I wanted to know what it was and of course I said no. Then he proceeded to tell me. He told me that he was working on a "mini-autobiography". I had no idea what he might be referring to. Then he went on to say that it starts in the fourth grade when he first met Jeff and it will continue until the day he died. He said that every Friday at school he has to write for 45 minutes and he decided that this is what he would write about. He had asked the teacher who had said it was fine. So he will write about all of the adventures (my word not his) that he had with Jeff -- including many that I would know nothing about. He went on to say that there was some stuff he would not write about -- to which I said that I thought that Jeff won't mind now if I knew about them. He said that he was going to make a number of copies -- one for me, one for John, one for Doug, one for Jim, one for Kimberly (Jim's second wife) to give to August (Doug and Jeff's halfbrother) when August grew up. He had decided that he would type them all up and that the pages would be bound.

James and a friend drove to the house and had lunch together this week with me as well. I felt for James -- and for me -- it was hard to see him at the house without Jeff being there and hard for him too to be there.

I simply can not think of a better series of days lately than these.
And I am so very very grateful for them -- and the continued love I am able to give to two of Jeff's closest friends. A little touch of Jeff -- right here, right now...for all of us.